What is the purpose of World Cancer Day? And what it means to us. 8 mins read Relationships It’s World Cancer Day on 4th February. I know it feels like there’s a day to mark everything, and you’re right – if you’re waiting for Fruit Cake Toss Day, I’m afraid that was the first Saturday of January. However I think we can all agree that Cancer is something that, unfortunately, does need our attention. The awful, harsh reality is that 1 in 2 us will develop some form of Cancer in our lifetime, so if it’s not you, it’s someone very close to you. What is the purpose of World Cancer Day?The purpose of World Cancer Day is to raise awareness and encourage prevention, detection and treatment of the disease. Survival rates of certain cancers have improved dramatically and we know how important early detection is. Thinking of most of the adults I know, we’re in this Rush Hour stage of life when we’re often overwhelmed and busy, we might be having babies and undergoing massive changes in our bodies, followed by Perimenopause, juggling careers and keeping up with life and there’s not a lot of time to focus on ourselves.That niggling pain, feeling exhausted, changes in bowel movements, they’re all things to put down to something else. And they could well be just that you need a hot bath and a bit more sleep. But the symptoms that we might dismiss could be early signs of something more serious and catching cancer early leads to a very different outcome. Why is cancer awareness so important?Days like World Cancer Day create a platform to hear real stories, which is vital for moving people away from a ‘but that wouldn’t happen to me’ mindset, but also because no two cancer experiences are the same. There are so many factors that impact a person’s cancer ‘journey’, including diagnosis and treatment but also the support they have around them and their mental health. A personal cancer storyMy husband Doug was 30 when he was diagnosed with a rare thyroid cancer. We’d been married two years and at 29, I was fourteen weeks pregnant with our first baby. Being so young, and perhaps with my attention a little taken up with, well, me, I hadn’t paid a huge amount of attention when Doug had night sweats. He had loose bowels and felt more tired than usual, and as a young, fit former rugby player, he was pretty in tune with his body, enough to know that something was up. After pushing for a referral, pretty quickly Doug was having various blood tests and scans. I wasn’t actually planning to go with him for his test results. I had work, I was sure it was nothing – the doctor had mentioned IBS. That morning, my boss at the time said ‘Er, sounds like you should probably go along?’, so I did and to say I had the rug pulled from under me is an understatement. I sat next to Doug in a state of shock as the consultant explained it was Stage 3 and that the first course of action was pretty major surgery to remove his thyroid and any of the surrounding affected area, and that it would be very soon. Doug sat quietly next to me, handing me tissues – while I’d been blissfully ignorant, he had known. The following weeks and months are a blur. Doug was in hospital for a couple of weeks, and then had to go back in because of his breathing. Now that I have kids I think I can better imagine how our parents felt, especially Doug’s. It’s the wrong order of events isn’t it? For your newly-married, about-to-become-a-dad child to be diagnosed with something that would kill him if left untreated. We didn’t have kids at this point and had, until then, been enjoying a very sociable whale of a time with our friends. They were a brilliant support, and also knocked sideways a bit – Doug is a big strong bloke and this was the first experience for most of our group that demonstrated that life might not all be Sunday pub sessions and having fun. Once recovered from the surgery, Doug had six weeks of radiotherapy, finishing the day before I went into labour with our son, Buster, four weeks early. The doctors have said that I was probably pretty tense throughout the pregnancy (probably!) and my body kind of ‘released’ at the end of Doug’s treatment. The weeks after treatment were hard – with a new baby and the after-effects of radiotherapy that left Doug depleted and in a lot of pain. With the gift of hindsight, it’s the following months and years where cancer leaves a fallout. Fear about any loved ones with a pain. A realisation that some emotions have been blocked because they felt too big to deal with. A harsh reality check about the fragility of life that will never leave you. I’ve heard Doug say he feels kind of a fraud, because he’s ok and we know too many people who have not had that luck. And we have been so lucky. Doug’s cancer isn’t curable – at least not yet – but he is monitored and tested regularly and in that time it hasn’t grown. It’ll be fifteen years this year. In some ways we feel like that reality check came earlier for us as a couple than most people, and while there are plenty of days where he winds me up in all the usual ways a partner does, we were exposed to a rawness and strength in each other that might normally take a lot longer to see. Ways we work with cancer organisations and people with cancerIt goes without saying that working with Stand Up To Cancer to create a care package meant a lot to me. When we receive messages from people who’ve sent one of our gift boxes to a loved one or colleague going through a diagnosis or treatment, I know how helpless the people involved can feel, and what it means to be able to show you’re there with someone at such an overwhelming time.We’ve worked with people who’ve been through cancer to select products that will offer some comfort – soft socks, blankets and scarves for comfort, soothing creams and balms, boiled sweets as some people told us they really helped. Crucially, it’s a ‘Create’ package, so that the customer can select what goes into the gift, because every person’s experience is different and what might offer relief or comfort will vary depending on diagnosis and treatment. How you can support someone with cancerThere’s a barrage of information that comes with a diagnosis, and as more tests and decisions are made daily, there’s always further information. Dealing with that as well as the emotional impact, and other people’s emotions, is a lot. A few things really helped us:Information sharers – in our friendship group, one friend became the ‘information sharer’. Rather than us having to repeatedly update people and answer questions, he did that job, which was a massive help. Friends that listened. There are some dark days – I was imagining a funeral and writing a eulogy and sometimes I just needed to cry and wail. Sometimes I wanted to hear about someone else’s life or be distracted by stories of botched celeb botox. You don’t need every friend to pile in to take that on, just a handful that get it and you and know the right thing to say when you need it. Practical help – Doug’s work helped me get to and from the hospital and put me up in a hotel the night of his surgery so I could be nearby. Some people sent food. I think for anyone with children anything that helps to entertain them – a new book or activity – because there’s also guilt involved when someone is ill and can’t deliver much energy. We have ‘extras for kids’ in our Stand Up To Cancer Care Package for that reason. To feel loved – it was a scary time and looking back, we felt so loved by the people around us. That came in many forms – those that remembered appointments and results, thoughtful gifts and notes of encouragement, checking in on difficult days, and recognising that Cancer continues to have an impact beyond the surgeries and treatment. So the message for World Cancer Day is to know and look after your body – don’t put off that appointment – and look after each other. You can also donate to a cancer charity. Rather than thinking of it as a donation, think of it as investing in your future. There were limited treatment options available to Doug in 2010, and this has changed remarkably since then and that is down to developments in science made possible by funding. And I just want to send extra love to anyone going through this – either yourself or alongside someone you care about. I hope there are good people around you and you can let them support you in all the ways you need. Steph x If you’re looking for a gift for someone going through Cancer, The Stand Up To Cancer Care Package allows you to create a bespoke gift. Don’t Buy Her Flowers are proud to support the charity by making an annual donation to its groundbreaking research. Be the first to leave a comment Cancel replyYour email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *Name * Email * Comment *I consent to my submitted data being collected and stored in accordance to our Privacy Policy Δ
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